A couple of weeks ago, I was coordinating a training event for around 100 participants - and using 5 facilitators from the company I work with. So we were spread out over 5 rooms in a Learning Centre at our client (yes a large client who could afford to build a Learning Centre).. So we used 5 different training rooms across the complex for the 5 groups.
I misplaced my pen while setting up the rooms. And didn't notice until I needed the pen around 1/2 hour after training started. So I was moving around the training centre searching. The key Maintenance staff member who looked after the centre asked me an interesting question:
"So what are you doing?" to which I replied "I can't find my pen".
His follow up question was "So what are you telling yourself while you're searching? Are you saying to yourself 'I can't find my pen? or 'Why can't i find my pen'? or are you saying to yourself - 'I'm gonna find my pen - I want to find my pen'??"
Now that pulled me up - I knew what I was thinking and probably mumbling "I can't find my pen". or I was thinking "Why can't I find my pen?". I immediately stopped and was compelled to say to him - "actually I WAS asking myself the question of why I can't find my pen - now I'm going to say to myself, I WILL find my pen - I WANT to find my pen". And as soon as I said that, I could feel the relief - not stressed any more about finding my pen - because I KNEW I would find my pen.
And, guess what? I found my pen as soon as the next break came up - as soon as I stopped stressing about it.
So don't dwell on the hard questions that you can't answer straight-away, (or even the easy ones), KNOW that you will find the answer to the question and you WILL. So the way you search for something has a big impact on whether you find it..
I stopped stressing about my dream job that I always wanted - and now I'm living my dream.. You can too.
Bommer.
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